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  Aimee felt her lip twitch, "No. If you catch him kill him Dorian don’t waste a second trying to find a redeemable quality."

  Dorian laughed, "I've never given pause Aimee, never." He shook Daniels hand and walked from the room.

  Ari stirred on the bed but Aimee was still lost in the fact that Dorian was on the good side, the man had called humans Sheep. She knew he enjoyed sucking the souls from young girls. She shivered remembering the girl in the woods he'd let her murder in the beginning before she'd learned any control. The girl in the woods was still her only innocent but it bothered her.

  She looked at Daniel, "I'm going home."

  He looked up from his work at the computer and smiled, "Thanks for coming. She'll be there next week."

  Aimee nodded and winked home, she needed Shane.

  Chapter Nineteen- Payback is a Bitch Named Forgiveness

  Ari

  The house seemed empty as she crossed over the threshold into the main entryway. Lucas had been sent somewhere, Ben had been sent with him, Aimee was sleeping at Shane's every night and checking in when she had to and Lydia had been working on something Ari knew nothing about.

  "Why Miss Ari you's don’t need to be standing in the hallway like a stranger? Come in. It's getting hot out there anyway. Leaving the door open only makes it worse."

  Ari smiled at the maid, "Good to see you Annabelle. Is anyone here?"

  "Just us chickens Miss Ari."

  Ari nodded, "Great." She had never been an advocate of alone time or sitting around and thinking. She looked around at everything and got an idea, "Annabelle tell Lydia I had some things to do. I'll be back around dinner."

  Annabelle waved, "Be safe."

  Ari nodded and walked back out of the house. She looked around wondering about the guards. Daniel had made a girl named Izzy drop her at home as she had texts from everyone telling her they wouldn’t be around. She shrugged not thinking much about it and started to walk. She could feel the power in her legs again, like before. She passed through the guards knowing that no matter what came at her she could defend herself.

  A thought rang though out her head and she nodded walking to a bus stop. She knew she had a few things on her list of shit to do that had to be completed before the other Ari would be able to remain silent in peace.

  The bus ride made Ari nervous, she'd never been a bus girl, their town in the desert had been so small. There actually hadn’t been any buses at all there.

  Her heart tugged thinking about her uncle and she knew he was on her list of things she needed to do.

  Other Ari guided her to a part of town she was barely allowed to see the memories from. She got off the bus and walked down a quiet street noticing a sick and dirty feeling growing in her stomach. She knew it wasn’t hers but she couldn’t help but feel more nervous as she drew closer to her destination. She rounded a street corner and as her eyes made contact with the wrought iron fence and gate dread filled her.

  "It's okay Ari, it's okay." She whispered to herself.

  Her palms were blasting heat from them as her nerves were heightened from the stress of it all. She watched from behind a tree as the children played.

  A small boy played alone digging in the dirt lifelessly with a stick. She knew he would be a favorite. She could spot them by the lack of will to live. The hair on her body stood on end as she watched throughout the crowd able to pick out the kids who would need her. The ones whose lives were forever tainted and ruined by the life they'd lived in the orphanage where no one protected them. Society didn’t think about the fact that orphans were left under the control of a select group of people and what happened when one of those people betrayed the trust that was placed in them.

  She could see a few habits out of the corner of her eye. She remained out of sight in case on of them accidentally recognized her. She knew she looked different than when other Ari had been there but she couldn’t take any chances.

  The children were called in for supper and Ari watched as the lifeless ones were dragged in being yelled at and spanked. She remembered that. The memory was hazy and hurt her brain to see it but New Ari accidentally let it slip through the cracks. She was standing outside looking at the gates, maybe ten years old. She saw the other side of the gate as freedom. She thought about life beyond the gate. She had a family out there somewhere looking for her. She like all the others knew it was a mistake, she wasn’t supposed to be growing up in an orphanage.

  The nun grabbed her dragging her in, hitting her legs with a switch. It stung but her eyes wouldn’t produce tears. She wasn’t allowed to eat dinner because of the dawdling. She was forced to go to HIS office. She panicked knowing what would happen. Her stomach hurt. She looked at the nun prepared to beg for her life but the wicked smile on the nuns face told her the truth, she knew. She knew what happened in the office. She knew about the back room. Ari's mind shut off as she leaned forward and threw up on the tree she was hiding behind. She trembled panting. She had no idea it had been that bad. Other Ari hadn’t really ever let her seen behind the curtain.

  With even more resolve she knew what she had to do and even though her body screamed at her to leave she couldn’t. She had to move forward and finish it.

  She walked around the block to the back of the property as the sun started to go down, she had barely noticed the heat of the day in her panicked state. She looked at the gate and pulled herself up and over in no time. She smiled thinking about how strong she had become. She crept along the back of the building to the laundry room. It was always open a crack because of the humidity. The laundry ladies always left around dinnertime. She looked up at the metal door seeing the small crack and smiled. She had snuck out so often and there she was sneaking back in. She climbed the four stairs quietly and peaked through the crack of the open door. She didn’t see any movements in the large laundry room and opened the door quickly. She knew that if she could get to him everything would change.

  She dashed into a storage closet to ensure no one was around before she ventured out into the hallways. Dinnertime was always a private time for HIM. He usually had a child to punish. Her palms sweat thinking about hurting him.

  She stayed in the closet for two breaths and then stepped out looking all around her. She walked to the clean clothes cupboard for the nuns and pulled out a habit and pulled it on over her clothes. She caught a glimpse of herself and smiled, hopefully no one would notice how young she was or that she had the blade of a sword coming up the side of her throat.

  Ari walked around to the service stairs she'd hidden in many times and walked up them as quickly as she could. She could hear the children talking and laughing as they ate their dinners.

  Nuns shouted over top telling them to stop and eat. She felt a deep hatred for those women. Maybe they had never wanted children and maybe they had always wanted to serve god but they'd done a piss poor job of it.

  Ari got to the second floor and felt her heart pounding in her chest. She took a deep breath trying to calm it down. She slipped along the dark wooden corridor listening. Nothing moved around her and she couldn’t hear any breathing. She walked to his wing.

  "You’ve been a very bad boy Anthony. Again you’ve dawdled and defied the nuns. God needs me to cleanse you."

  Ari winced as she approached the voice. It was HIS. Her skin shivered as she drew closer, she was terrified of him whether she wanted to admit it or not. He'd taken something she wanted back, her dignity and trust in humankind.

  "Now you sit here for a minute and think about your punishment and I'll be right back. I need to prepare the room."

  Her breath turned ragged as she heard his footsteps leaving the room, he was going to the back room. Her stomach lurched forward again but she managed to swallow it and slip into the room.

  The boy from the playground with the stick sat in the chair trembling. Silent tears rolled down his face. She put a hand to his shoulder.

  Just as she would have he turned sharply terrified of what touched
him.

  She smiled and put a finger to her lips.

  He looked at her frightened, he didn’t trust nuns. She knew she didn’t look like a normal nun with all her tats and hoped that would help him to remain calm.

  She slipped past him and saw it. There before her was the door. Her hands trembled as she reached for the door but it opened instead.

  "What are you doing here? Who are you?"

  He looked older, his face was more chubby than before but still as ugly and disgusting. His thick lips disgusted her as he spoke.

  She frowned, "You don’t remember me?" The voice leaving her throat scared even her.

  He looked at her and his eyes lit up, "Ari? You defiant little bitch, you came back." He grabbed her arm and dragged her into the room closing the door. She nearly gagged at the smell in the room. Her own blood and sweat had contributed to the smell in the room.

  She stood watching him start to corner her the way he used to before.

  She felt it, the other Ari was terrified but she wasn’t. The things he did were done to someone else not her. She stood up straighter meeting his filthy gaze.

  "You’ve grown up Ari. You look like the big girl I always told you you would be, disgusting street trash."

  He licked his fat lips and her hand flew out punching him in the head. His sweaty skin jiggled as it made contact. The room was tiny with a small bed and no windows. The light was always muted, like the cell it was.

  He staggered back smiling, "Ari you always did like to play rough."

  He reached to the shelf beside him and pulled a funny looking gun off. He pointed it at her smiling wickedly.

  She tried to leap out of the way but the twin cords attached sending a shock through her body. She felt the most intense pain she'd ever felt fill her taking control of her muscles. Tears slipped from her eyes against her will. The pain ended as abruptly as it had started and she fell to the ground.

  He took a step toward her, "Ari Ari Ari, did you think I wouldn’t be prepared in case anyone ever came back for a visit? Lets have some fun before I call the police shall we?"

  He was on her tearing at her habit moving faster than a man his size should be able to before she could gain control of herself. The shock of the taser gun had taken the heat from her hands. She started to panic snapping her fingers trying to get the spark again.

  Instead the door burst open as it was ripped from its hinges.

  "ARI!"

  She looked up at Lucas storming the room. She thought maybe she was dreaming but he had Father Michaels against the wall and off the ground before she was able to speak a single sound.

  His fat face turned a deep shade of red as Lucas choked the life from him.

  "You. Never. Touch. Her." Lucas growled nearly unleashing his wolf.

  Ari shouted, "No. I have to send him back. I have to push him so they can be free."

  Lucas pushed against his throat once more and lowered him so his feet touched the ground, "Ari I have about a second of patience before I fucking kill him." His words were growled.

  She knew he was fighting his faze which would mean he wouldn’t be able to stop himself and the priest would be ripped to pieces.

  "I-I-I'm sorry. I will stop. Please let me g-g-g-go." He begged for his life. She closed her eyes for a split second enjoying the sound in the air. It soothed other Ari so deeply.

  She stood on her shaking legs and stumbled toward him. Seeing his eyes dart back and forth from her to Lucas brought back her hatred. Her fingers burned thinking about what he might have done to her.

  "Now." She spoke softly.

  Lucas let him go and Ari put her hands out to catch him. She felt the smile cross her lips as her hands made contact with his and she pushed. It was her most violent push. He was shoved back against the wall violently.

  The air opened and suddenly he was a boy maybe fourteen, he was torturing animals in cages and hurting his little sister. His mom worked all the time and he had no father so his time with his sister was unlimited. One day he followed a girl home from school, he looked hungry as he watched her. He forgot his rope and ran back to get it. When he got back she was with a group of friends. He was angry but he knew he'd been saved from being discovered.

  Suddenly he was back at that moment and instead of going for the rope he ran at her knocking her to the ground. He hit her over and over until she stopped fighting. His urges were out of control. He pulled at her shirt and lifted her skirt.

  Just as he was doing his horrible deed the group of kids came. The boys ran at him and pulled him off her. They beat him and beat him. The police came and took him away. Suddenly he was in a room with a lot of light, he was old and fat and drooling from his mouth watching TV and a nurse was giving him pills.

  He faded from the room leaving his rosary with its black beads floating in the air. She reached her fingertips out to touch it but like all the other tokens it dropped crashing to the floor. She looked at Lucas who faded walking toward her. She knew she would see him at Lydia's again.

  Ari fell back as it all lifted from her like a veil that had covered her preventing the light in. The cloud of doom the priest been responsible for. The memories changed inside her again. She watched as the room surrounding her filled with shelves and books. The bed vanished and the smell was replaced with an older smell linked in her brain with dust.

  The New Ari felt the piercings leave, the tattoos wiped clean, every scar smoothed over. In his place a kind man with sparkly grandpa eyes and a kind face filled her memories. He had a firm but fair hand with the kids. The only hand he laid on her involved hugs or pats on the back. He truly was a man of god. He had the nuns replaced who hated the children. He defended the children. Smiles replaced the tears and love replaced the pain. She looked down at herself standing in the book room holding a book. She no longer wore the habit but a pair of jeans and t-shirt. She wore a blue wristwatch and her nails were clean. Everything about her skin was clean. Her heart was full. Ari didn’t know how heavy the other Ari had been until she had been replaced by the new Ari who was full of kindness. She didn’t block out her memories the way the other had. She was an open book making Ari uncomfortable but at the same time she was almost exactly the same as old Ari. She ran, she finished high school and was in university. She worked part time in a restaurant. Her life wasn’t pain.

  Ari didn’t know how to sort through it all so she pushed it down taking the control back. She stepped from the book room seeing the older man standing with his back to her. He stepped out and smiled, his kind face filling with respect and love.

  "Ari you came for a visit. I didn’t realize you were here. What a happy coincidence. I was actually just telling Anthony about how much he reminded me of you. All that dawdling and day dreaming." He laughed shaking his head.

  Ari smiled down at the little boy, the same little boy but he was different just as she was. He was clean again.

  "You daydreamed a lot too?" Anthony asked softly.

  She smiled and nodded, "Yeah but it helps me run so that’s a good thing that comes from daydreaming." She crouched down to his eyes level, "Sometimes amazing things come from daydreams."

  He smiled and hugged her, a perfect stranger. Her heart melted thinking about the shell of a child he had been.

  She squeezed him back. She had healed herself and saved the kids all in one stroke of luck.

  "So you wanted to borrow a book?" Father James asked patted her back softly.

  She stood and nodded, "I guess so yeah." She looked at the book and smirked.

  "Well The Book of Angels is a good book. I have to get downstairs for a meeting. Stop by again kiddo."

  She hugged the man her heart recognized affectionately.

  She walked from the office, "See ya later, bye Anthony."

  "Bye Ari."

  The bus ride home felt amazing compared to the one only hours before in her mind. She walked with a skip in her step as she made her way to the street where she lived. Something nagged at he
r but she pushed everything else down enjoying the freedom of being herself again. She sighed feeling the guards as she stepped through them.

  The house seemed like a happy sight as if she hadn’t been there in ages. She walked up the steps and opened the front door.

  She could hear everyone in the kitchen, she'd wondered where Lucas had gone after he saved her. She couldn’t wait to thank him.

  She walked into the kitchen more full than she'd ever seen it.

  "Ari!"

  The faces all seemed excited to see her. She smiled feeling weird about the strangely excited greeting. She had thought they were all gone on business but was excited to see them.

  "Hey guys."

  She saw Lucas and smiled. He smiled back but continued to eat at the table.

  Aimee nodded at her barely taking her eyes off her cell phone, "How's it going?"

  She raised an eyebrow, "Good?" Aimee acted coldly toward her.

  Lydia walked to her passing her a plate of food, "Here sweetie before the boys eat it all." Ari looked down at the plate of Annabelle's famous French toast and bacon.

  "Thanks Lydia."

  Lydia frowned at her, "You seem kind of weird today dear."

  Ari looked at everyone watching her and smiled, "It was a good day." She was surprised none of them noticed her scars and tattoos missing. She glanced at Lucas but he continued to eat almost purposely ignoring her.

  She watched him trying to catch his eye but he kept his eyes to his food. When Aleksander got up from the table he smiled at her, "Here Ari sit here."

  She smiled and sat down next to Lucas. She moved her chair closer to his. She wrapped her arm around his and snuggled against his arm.

  When he turned his face to hers she pressed her lips against his.

  He seemed rigid.

  "Thanks for coming and saving me today. I will never forget what you did. I love you." She kissed him again.

  His lips never budged.

  "What the hell?"