The Light of the World Read online

  "I think I have stomach cancer or something."

  He ignores me. The pain becomes too intense. My legs buckle and he picks me up. I gag and he starts to run. His running doesn't make my stomach feel better.

  He places me down when we get outside and walks away from me. I bend and heave into the garden next to his house. There is nothing in my stomach. It's burning from emptiness.

  "I need a doctor. Please, please let me go to the hospital." I cough.

  He is pacing beside me. He looks stressed. He's going to kill me now. I can see it in his eyes. He grabs my hand and pulls me along the greens. I can feel anger building inside of me.

  "Stop pulling me. I'm sick. I need a doctor." I jerk my hand. Fire builds inside of me and he lets me go. He runs to a guy walking on the greens and smashes him in the face. I scream and fall to my knees. He drags the guy to me and places him on the ground in front of me.

  "GET AWAY FROM ME! GET AWAY! YOU'RE FUCKING CRAZY! LEAVE ME ALONE!"

  I swat at him, but he grabs my hands and puts them on the bare forearm of the unconscious guy. Wyatt's stronger than I am. I am trying to scream but I can't. My throat is hoarse from all the throwing up.

  Wyatt backs away and watches me. I can smell the cologne on the guy and something else. Something musty. I stop fighting it. I feel the injured man and let my senses take over. Something shifts inside of me. I hear a growling noise and realize it's coming from me.

  I sniff the air around the guy's face and breathe it in. I feel a pull in my lungs. Like they are screaming for the air I'm breathing coming off the guy. My fingers shake and dig in and I don’t know what's happening to me. I don’t know where I am. I just know my fingers are kneading him like a cat. My fingers are squeezing and twitching into the warmth of his flesh. I bend my face over his and inhale, like it's the first time breathing after being under water my whole life. My lungs expand and the air that hits them is sweet. I growl on the exhale and suck in again. My fingers are warm and sticky, but I can't stop them from gripping him. I inhale a third time and my body convulses. I twitch and moan and it feels like I've had an orgasm, on the grass. Gross.

  I shiver and open my eyes. The world is different. There is more color and the wind tickles me with whispers and promises. I feel a power coming off of me. It's intense and amazing. I can hear the dead instantly. No matter how hard I try to not hear them, they are everywhere. The air sparkles with them.

  My eyes dart to where Wyatt stands and I see something different about him. I see the thing I saw the night I was scared of him. The magic in my tummy becomes anger. His face looks more pronounced. His eyes are striking. They can see through me. They can see every thought I've ever had. I'm sure of it.

  "What?" I snap at him.

  He shakes his head and sighs, "Rayne, we need to go now."

  I look down at the man in front of me on the grass. He's pale and his eyes are closed.

  Wyatt looks around and grabs my hand. His skin burns mine, like a shock has jolted between us. I scream out but he drags me across the greens. We run until we reach his car. My skin is smoking where he touches me. He drops my hand. I hold it up and cry.

  "What have you done to me?"

  He opens the door and shoves me inside.

  He gets in and starts the car. He drives the way I imagined he would. He's fast and out of control but in a way that seems like he's in control. I would bet his skills are unmatched, by even racecar drivers.

  "What are you?"

  "Sit as far away from me as you can. Don’t get too close. I'm making you sick. Press against the window."

  I lean against the cold window and put my hand on it. The burn is feeling better but it still hurts.

  "What are you?"

  He looks at me as we race along the winding road, "The better question is, what are you Rayne? What has she told you?"

  I shake my head, "I don’t know what you mean."

  He sneers, "Your mother. She keeps it at bay with a macrobiotic diet and intense yoga but she can't keep it at bay all the time. She must do nightclubs for the mini sucks. Let me guess she never has sex? Never dates?"

  I don’t want to hear it. I don’t want him to tell me things about her. "You know nothing about her or me."

  He looks at me and his eyes burn a hole in me, "I know you. I know all about you." For the first time I'm able to fear him properly. My lust for him has intensified but I can feel the fake pull he's giving off. He's making me attracted to him. He's making me want him. I'm not crazy. It's not real love.

  After a while I ask, "Where are we going?"

  "Home."

  "Where's home?"

  "Your house."

  I scowl, "You can't meet Willow. She's going to hate you."

  He grins his cocky smile, it makes my skin crawl, "Your kind always hate me."

  "My kind? You're a dick. Why did you need to see my mom Wyatt? You heard how hot she was, didn’t you? Look, she's not like that."

  He rolls his eyes, "I don’t need to force myself on cougars Rayne. Jesus. Thanks though. You're always so full of nice things and compliments."

  "Why do you want to go to my house?"

  "We need to find out what you are and why you make me, uncomfortable."

  I laugh bitterly and cry a little bit, "I make you uncomfortable. You're burning me and made me hurt that man. Trust me, you make me far more uncomfortable."

  He glances at me as he takes a sharp corner, "I doubt that."

  "Why did you beat me? Do you like hitting girls?"

  His eyes look dead and his lips fight the emotions he refuses for me to see. "I needed to see. Violence makes the change pronounce itself. When I hit you the rage filled you and you couldn’t hide it from me."

  "What do you think I'm hiding from you? I never changed. I'm the same. You're the one that's gotten crazier and crazier."

  He clenches his jaw and says nothing. Maybe nothing is better at this point. He's fucking nuts. I'm not sure what that makes me. I need a plan.

  I lean back against the window and watch the road. He's driving me home. He's going to kill me or Willow or both of us. He's unstable and my cell phone is at school still. I can see it on my bedside table. I feel the panic starting to increase with every mile we get closer to home. I'm getting antsy.

  I'm not hungry the same way I was before. I think about the man. I don’t know what to think. It doesn’t make sense in my rational brain.

  "What did I do to him? The man." Tears stream down my cheeks. Everything feels messy. I look down at the dried blood on my fingers and feel dirty.

  He sighs. I think he's annoyed with my question. He runs his hands through his dark hair, "You sucked him dry. I think you're a succubus. But you seem different. You might only be half. I've never seen eyes glow like that on a succubus. Like the light is coming from inside. Witches eyes glow and angels. But you would know if you were either of those things. Your eyes really glow."

  I scoff, "You should have seen the waitress's."

  He looks sharply, "What waitress? That’s why you ran? Shit, I thought she told you about how she kept trying to sleep with me last year."

  "Gross. No. She was nice, she just knew my dreams and her eyes were like fire."

  "Fire Witch. Fuck. How…?" He clenches his jaw again.

  My questions and confusion are overwhelming.

  The rest of the short drive is silent.

  I don’t want any more answers.

  The welcome sign to Plattsburg is not a welcome sight. I feel dread so thick in my belly I feel like I might explode. I wonder what my chances are of getting away from him. My brain is formulating plans but they all suck.

  "Where is it?"

  I stare straight ahead.

  "Rayne, I can find her on my own. I can smell her out. She has left a trail all over the town, I guarantee it."

  "You can smell vegan yoga instructors? Fine go ahead. Sniff her out."

  He grabs my hand and fire burns into me again, "Where?"

&n
bsp; I jerk my hand from him, "Promise you won't hurt her? Please just take me where ever you want to take me and I promise I'll do whatever you want me to."

  He looks disgusted, "Rayne." He grabs my shoulders and burns me, through my shirt. "I am not going to hurt you. She has some questions to answer though. She owes you answers." His eyes burn.

  He's crazed.

  My voice cracks from the pain and trauma, "Promise you won't hurt her."

  "No. Where is it?" His voice is filled with regret and emotion.

  I press my lips into each other.

  Fuck him. "Fuck you."

  My eyes burn and tears flow down my cheeks in steady streams.

  He revs the engine and makes a hard turn. He sticks his face out the window and drives. He makes another hard turn, sharp. It throws me against him. I lean into him and wince from the contact.

  He drives for half an hour and then pulls up in front of our house.

  I am stumped.

  He climbs out of the car and walks up to our small house.

  I don’t get out. I'm shaking. The blood on my fingers is the tip of the iceberg of shit that's wrong. I can't let her see me like this. Maybe she won't answer the door.

  He looks back at me and climbs the front steps. He bangs on the door with intensity.

  The door doesn’t open. I look up and see Willow in the window on the second story. She sees me in the car. She is staring at me with terror across her face. Her strawberry blonde hair is pulled up in a bun. I can see her pulling out the knitting needle she has in there, holding it up. She wants me to see it. She bites her lip and puts a hand against the windowpane. I cry and look up at her. I'm ashamed my love of some freak is about to escalate.

  I look at him banging on the door. He looks savage. He left the keys in the car. I press the door lock.

  He glances at me and steps back from the door. She watches me from the window. He kicks the door open and walks into my house.

  Her eyes never leave mine. I motion for her to run. I'm a coward. I should have gone in with him. I should be protecting her right now.

  Why isn’t she calling the police?

  After a few tense minutes, I see him walking around behind her. He's feeling with his hands. He is calling. He doesn’t see her. I don’t know how, but he doesn’t. She takes a step to the side. He comes to the window and looks down on me. She's in the window, right beside him. Her face turns psychotic and she raises the knitting needle. She drives it down on his throat. Her mouth opens, just as mine does. We scream at the exact same moment, for completely different reasons. Crimson blood sprays across my bedroom window.

  Panic and pain and confusion are superceded by shock. I fumble with the door handle. The lock I clicked.

  Panicking and sobbing, I push the lock and leap from the car. Her hand is still coming down on him. Slicing in the air. He's trying to fight her.

  My legs push hard. I scream as I enter the house, "MOM NOOOOOO!"

  I run up the stairs inside, skipping stairs. I can't breathe, I can't get the air. Tears and sobs are blocking my airways. I burst into my room, which is now covered in blood spray. I slide along the floor to him. He clutches his throat wide eyed. She licks the needle and glares at me.

  "A fucking Van Helsing, Nene? Really?"

  Her eyes are bright green. I've never seen them look so alive. She growls at him and slides the needle into his throat again.

  I push her aside and hold his bleeding throat. My fingers press into the wounds. He gasps for air, but sounds like he is drowning. My tears are mixing with his blood. His skin is burning mine.

  I'm holding him and rocking and she is watching me. He growls and her eyes widen in fear.

  Chapter Eight

  He watches me from the corner of the room. His needle marks are filling in. My burns on my hands are healing. Willow is pacing like a savage.

  He is still alive and that is the least weird thing I've seen all morning.

  "How the fuck? How? I can see it on his face Nene. Jesus Christ. Jesus. You can't do this to me and to you. Your mother would…"

  My face snaps up and she drops to her knees. She covers her face and sobs.

  "What? What did you say?"

  She shakes her head and looks at him, "We need to run Rayne."

  He looks at her and then at me.

  "How could you let her live without knowing?" His sentence makes no sense in comparison to all the other things in the air, floating around. I feel like any minute they will rain down on me and I won't live through the shock of everything. I have dreadful feeling everything is a lie.

  I feel like I'm in a dream or a movie.

  "You said my mother."

  She shakes her head, she ignores me, "You can't let them have me Van Helsing. Kill me or let us run."

  I put a hand out, "Whoa! Whoa! Wait a minute. You said my mother? Who the hell are you? Aren't you my mother?"

  She turns to face me and her face fills with rage. Her eyes are glowing green. She covers her face again.

  "She isn’t like you. She's a witch. She's an Earth Witch." His words are deadpan and cold. "I told you their eyes glow."

  She puts her hands out to him. "Let us run. I promise you'll never hear from us again."

  He glances at me. "What are you?"

  I spit at him, "What are you? What is she? What is a Fire Witch or an Earth Witch? WHAT AM I?"

  He looks at her and points at me. "Look how you've raised her. She is defenseless."

  I shake my head and scream, "SOMEONE EXPLAIN THIS TO ME NOW!"

  She sobs in a heap on the floor. "I failed you."

  He waits for her to speak but she doesn’t. "You're a succubus of some sort Rayne. She's your guardian I would bet. She is raising you the way you should live. Working to keep your powers at bay." His eyes dart to her, "But why? Who is she?"

  She sobs louder and then her sobs become a fit of laughter.

  She laughs like a crazy woman. She smiles at me and whispers, "I failed you Rayne." And then she is gone.

  "Fuck. We have to leave now."

  I look at him, "I'm not going anywhere with you. I want answers. Actually, fuck the answers. Get the fuck out of my house right now. My mother just vanished, vanished. Did you happen to catch that? She stabbed you repeatedly, and yet here you stand. What in the hell is going on?"

  He laughs, "I will answer the questions. Just stop cussing and freaking out. You sound nuts."

  I cry and laugh, mostly out of frustration. I want Willow and the answers to the questions I have.

  "I sound nuts? I sound nuts? I wonder why. Maybe because you make questions and chaos." I'm a heap on the floor.

  He stands and crosses the room in one of his huge steps. He looks down on me, threatening me with the sheer size of him. Double my size. Maybe triple. "We are leaving now. I'm not screwing around. If there is something you need. Like absolute must have, get it now. I need to find her lair."

  My lips tremble, "W-w-what?" I laugh hard. I am losing my mind. I want to pull my hair out, burn the fucking house to the ground and blow his car up. Then I want to turn myself in for killing the man on the grass. That’s what I want to be able to do.

  Instead I sit, frozen and lost. I sit and wait for things to make sense.

  He looks around and walks to the kitchen. He plays with the cupboards. I glance over. He's standing in front of a doorway I never knew existed. It's a secret entry inside of the pantry. He looks at me, "You should probably come with me."

  I don’t move. My feet refuse. They need answers. Answers about the secret room in the pantry and the secret mom I've never met.

  He walks to me and grabs my hand. I can barely get to my feet as he drags me across the floor. It burns where he touches me but the feeling of the pain is becoming a comfort. I think it's the only real thing in my life.

  He drags me down the old creepy stairs. They go down in a circular motion, like a castle tower would. The walls are brick, like the stairs. It's dark. My eyes light up instant
ly. I see perfectly.

  I walk to a bench at the bottom of the stairs and flick a switch on the wall.

  He looks around slowly. I don’t get how he can be so calm.

  "This is her lair."

  I snort.

  "Hey don’t laugh. She's probably in here with us. Earth Witches are crafty."

  I look around but don't see her. When he couldn’t see her I could.

  "Can she kill you?"

  He shakes his head, "No. I'm death for her. My blood, my skin, my spit, my sweat, everything about me is designed to kill you. All of you." Watching him rip the knitting needle from his throat and grab her savagely was bizarre. The way he dragged her downstairs, burning her skin was beyond bizarre.

  My skin shivers.

  "What's a succubus?"

  He walks to where a huge shelf is lined with books. He grabs a book and carries it to me. He blows the dust off and hands it to me.

  The writing is like nothing I've ever seen.

  "What's this book?"

  "It's her grimoire and journal. If anything can tell us what you are, it'll be that. She will have kept track of things with you. Changes."

  He walks back to the table and mixes something. He starts a fire and points to the stairs, "There isn’t anything in here. It's all just magic crap."

  I look around and shiver. I grip the book to my chest. The room is small. Books and herbs and vials line shelves and sit amongst debris on the tables. There is no light or windows. The walls are the same bricks from the stairs.

  I can see chalk drawings on the floor and walls. Like she had some sidewalk chalk and went crazy with it.

  The fire spreads fast. I hear a vial break. He turns and pulls me up the stairs.

  He drags me out to the car and I try not to look back. I try not to see the happy house I grew up in. The house I loved more than anything in the world, along with the mother I loved more than I loved myself. I try not to remember scraping my knee and the way she kissed it and bandaged me. The way she mothered me, but never let me call her mother.